Montana's - Canadian Burger Eh

Place: Montana's

Location: 9065 Airport Road, Brampton

Type: Chain Restaurant

Web Site: www.montanas.ca 

Atmosphere: both types, country and western

Burger: Canadian Burger Eh

# of pattys: 1

Special Sauce: Mayo

Toppings: Peameal Bacon

Type of cheese: Cheddar

Added Extra: Apple Butter BBQ Sauce

THE PLACE

Montana's is like a restaurant you would find in the old west, if the old west had air conditioning, piped in music and a debit machine. There is wood, or the semblance of wood, everywhere. The decor cries out "we are in the old west and don't you forget it." 

Also they put paper on the tables and give you crayons so you can play hangman, which is nice.

Also the glasses look like mason jars. I mean who doesn't love that? 

THE BURGER

The Canadian Burger Eh is a single patty burger brushed with apple butter BBQ sauce, topped with a slice of cheddar, two pieces of peameal bacon and a bit of mayo. It looks nice, although you can see it falls down on the burger to bun ratio it's fine on the bacon to bun ratio, which I just made up. It would be hard to not admit that this cheeseburger is tasty, but with the wrong type of tastes.

Yes, the Apple butter BBQ sauce tastes nice, as does the bacon and they mayo. The three of them together are just lovely. The problem is I wasn't able to taste either the burger or the cheese and if you can't taste those then what good is your cheeseburger? Simply put the burger cannot just be the delivery system of the BBQ sauce and the bacon, it has to be part of the meal. And why did this even have cheese at all? There was really no reason since it was buried under the bacon and was invisible taste wise.

The fries were nice, the bun was ok. Really this cheeseburger would have been above average ... Barely. It would have been so much better if I could taste the parts that make the cheeseburger a cheeseburger.

Rating: 2.2out of  5

How To Make a Cheeseburger Cake

Today The Cheeseburger Hunter is thinking about other types of food. Something sweet. Something delicious. And nothing is as sweet and delicious as cake. But what, and stay with me here because this is important, what if we could have a cheeseburger cake?

Well let fantasy become reality.

McDonalds - Cheeseburger

Place: McDonalds

Type: Franchise

Atmosphere: Hipster Wannabe

Burger: Cheeseburger

#of Patties: 1

Special Sauce: None

Toppings: None

Type of Cheese: Cheddar

THE PLACE

We all know McDonalds. So much that I almost feel silly writing this part. Big yellow arches. Garish color scheme. Scary ass clown. It's a part of everyone's childhood and, for some of us, a part of our adulthood. But McDonalds is going through a bit of an identity crises. It seems to want to be some sort of hipster coffee shop instead of a burger place, which is what it is. My local McDonalds actually went so far as to lose in store seating to this  aesthetic. Can you imagine a restaurant actually giving up seats just to appeal to a group of people who won't eat there anyway? Seriously McDonalds, what the hell is wrong with you?

THE BURGER

And here it is, the humble McDonalds cheeseburger. Possibly the most eaten cheeseburger in the world. (Well not this specific one, but you get the idea.) Not very pretty, is it? I mean it's very basic. Meat, cheese, bun, toppings. You will not be arguing philosophy with this burger. And yet there is something about it, something that keeps bringing you back. Probably because it is so simple, most likely because it is so damn easy to get.

When I took my first bite I was taken back to the days when I was a kid and there was only one McDonalds in town and a happy meal cheeseburger was a rare thing. Then I actually concentrated on the taste and ... It ... It wasn't very good.

Sure it tastes like a burger, and you could taste to cheese but there was something in there, maybe it was the taste of a frozen patty but it wasn't too nice. The bun was weak and my fingers went through the top. Honestly put it all together and I can only call it above bland. Certainly not the worse cheeseburger I've ever had but far, far from the best.

I've been using the idea of the McDonalds cheeseburger as my base line when rating cheeseburgers, working on the theory that it was at least a 2.5, but it isn't, not by a long shot. The McDonalds cheeseburger rates nothing more than a 1.0.

And yet I will still eat it, because I have a McDonalds around the corner from me and I am, at my heart, lazy.

Veggie Tales - His Cheeseburger

Remember Veggie Tales? Kids programming, starring vegetables with just a dash of religion. No? Me neither. But here they are with a song about a guy and his cheeseburger. It takes a bit to get going but once you get there it's kinda catchy.

Boston Pizza - Prime Rib Burger with cheese - Mississauga

Place: Boston Pizza

Location: 50 Courtney Park Drive, Mississauga

Type: Chain Restaurant. 

Web Site: www.bostonpizza.com

Atmosphere: Boring warehouse

Burger: B.P. Prime Rib Burger with cheese

# do Pattys: 1

Special Sauce: No (more on that later)

Toppings: ketchup

THE PLACE

Boston Pizza is a restaurant, that is for sure. They serve food, they have tables and chairs. It is definitely a place to sit and eat. It possible considers itself a classy place, since it is so devoid of decoration except for black and white photo's. It has there things that are made of metal and rise up from the end of booths that I guess you can hang your coats on. If you look up the ceiling seems to be a remnant of a factory. I know I'm not a classy guy but I really don't have anything to say about the decor other than it is un-remarkable.

THE BURGER

First I would like to point out that the B.P. Prime Rib Burger comes with a "zesty sauce that simply defies description." I can easily describe it as missing because it did not come on the burger. I specifically mentioned, when saying I didn't want lettuce or tomatoes, that I still wanted the special sauce.

Question: why didn't you ask for the special sauce to be put on when you noticed it wasn't on.

Answer: I am reviewing the burger I got, not the burger I wish I got.

Not that I think it would have made a difference. The burger was so bland I could honestly say it probably had no taste, none, it was like biting into water. Not just water, bland water. I cannot imagine how a special sauce could have made this burger any better and if  the special sauce was the thing that gave flavor to this burger than this burger would not be worth saving. A cheeseburger has to taste good on its own, the sauce is to compliment it. This burger did not taste good at all. It was an exceedingly below average cheeseburger.

But it looked nice, right? Yes, it did, but looks only go so far. It's taste that counts in the end and in this end there was no taste.

So points for a nice bun. Points for a nice looking patty. Points for a good slice of cheese. Minus several points for the terrible blandness.

Rating: .5 out of 5. 

Note: To be fair I will return to Boston Pizza and get the burger with the sauce and will update.

Mac Sabbath - Frying Pan

They call themselves the Kings of "Drive Through Metal." I don't know if this a real parody or if they are trying to make a point about something. But it's cheeseburger related so here we are. Presenting the band Mac Sabbath and their song Frying Pan. (A take off of the Black Sabbath song Iron Man.)

The Works - SK8R Boy

Place: The Works

Location: 8 Queen Street E, Brampton

Type: Chain Restaurant

Website: www.worksburger.com

Atmosphere: 80's Hair Metal

Burger: SK8R Boy

#of Pattys: 1

Special Sauce: Peanut Butter

Toppings: Bacon

Type of Cheese: Jack Cheese

THE PLACE

Do you know who the band Whitesnake is? No? Well look them up, I'll wait.

Ok, you back? Good. Now imagine you made a Whitesnake video then turned that video into a burger restaurant. That is The Works. An 80's hair metal of a restaurant. Not that I'm complaining. It's nice to find a restaurant that actually knows what it is then goes whole hog, unlike other places where hey just paint things white with a stripe and calls it decor. 

THE BURGER

First of all let us talk about the name. This burger is called the "SK8R Boy." I am not a SK8R Boy, I don't know anyone I could call a SK8R Boy. I know there is a song Called SK8R Boy which I don't like. This has nothing to do with the burger, I just wanted to say how much I don't like the song SK8R Boy.

Onto the burger. The SK8R Boy is a burger topped with peanut butter, jack cheese and bacon surrounded with an artisanal bun. It's tastes great! Greater than it should taste but not as great as it could taste. With each bite you could taste every flavor, no one taste overpowered the others. The peanut butter was not "drip off the burger onto your hand" runny (how they accomplish this I'll never know) and the jack cheese was big enough that you it was strong but not so big that it didn't hug the burger. The bacon was bacon, nice and crispy. The bun was lightly toasted and darn tasty.

So what was wrong with it? While each flavor could but tasted none of the flavors were strong enough to make my mouth light up with glee. Yes, you could tell it was a superior burger but it wasn't too superior that I'd remember the name tomorrow. (Which I didn't. I've had to refer to the company web site at least twice in writing this up.)

But here is the thing, I would have this again. Any cheeseburger that has peanut butter has my attention. Any cheeseburger that makes peanut butter taste so good is one I would have again.

Rating: 4 out of 5